Framing feedback as part of a reflection process in which you give conscious attention to “feedback loops” (like an engineer) rather than as a performance process in which you exchange “feedback messages” (like a manager or colleague) can profoundly change the way you think and talk about performance. There is no question that we need […]
Manifesting real results in the real world requires more than just telling yourself you deserve whatever it is you currently want
“I am well. I am opulent. I have everything. I do right. I know.” – Charles Benjamin Newcomb, author of 1897 book “All’s Right With the World” as quoted by Dr. Tara Isabella Burton in NYT editorial From Burton: ‘While the idea of manifesting may seem modern, the instinct to conflate spiritual forces, political and […]
Well-being is built on a solid foundation of inter-dependability
“New research published in the Industrial Relations Journal found no evidence that individual-level mental wellbeing interventions like mindfulness, resilience and stress management, relaxation classes, and wellbeing apps benefit employees.” — Some frame well-being as an individual challenge in which we liberate ourselves from the limitations and burdens others place on us. Another line of thinking places responsibility […]
Body language exists on the border between our internal and external worlds, but things don’t always translate clearly across the borders
Are you someone who has the habit of crossing your arms? Do you furrow your brow so you have RBF? Have others told you you need to work on your attitude? Does this describe something you see in your colleagues? When someone else crosses their arms or furrows their brow does it make you feel […]
Nouns or verbs? Labels and categories are easier to talk about than social dynamics and behavioral patterns, but what are the implications of relying on them too much to explain people’s bahavior?
Recently, I had a skeptical reaction to a TED talk in which Adam Grant seemed to be encouraging us to categorize each other into three categories of people: givers, takers and matchers. It was my sense that people’s behavior is probably too socially-embedded and fluid to be captured through this sort of categorization. I also […]
Don’t start your journey until AFTER you have made sure your elephant knows where it is supposed to take you
As human beings who sleep, wake up, do stuff, then go back to sleep, we all share a common dilemma: How do we make sure we don’t end the day feeling like it was a day wasted? Together with my colleague Andrea Konuma, I developed AFTER as a cuing mechanism I use at the start of […]
Can we really be categorized into givers, takers and matchers? Or are we just learners adapting to the cues we pick up as we wend our way across organizational minefields?
As I listened to this highly engaging and entertaining TED talk, I kept wondering what assumptions about organizations and people led Adam Grant to believe that it would be helpful to suggest we can (should?) divide our peers up into givers, takers and matchers. I believe he is onto something important, and I agree that […]
Purpose: the multiplier that turns THE GRIND into TRUE GRIT for MEANINGFUL GROWTH
True Grit = Passion + Perseverance x PURPOSE Purpose is the multiplier that makes hard work less of a grind. COMPELLING SENSE OF PURPOSE is the catalytic element that is often missing from exhortations that we show more GRIT or find a GROWTH MINDSET. PASSION and PERSEVERENCE can be very hard to maintain if you […]
Our emotions reflect the stories we generate to explain and survive the broad range of situations we encounter in life
Our brains seem to cue our affective states (including extremes ones like depression) through a continuous series of predictions of what physiological state will most efficiently promote our short-term survival. The symptoms are physiological, but the emotional label is psychosocial. The physical symptoms that accompany emotions – such as a racing or slowing heartbeat, flushed […]
Finding the place where we belong in a world in which boundaries are fading
The search to find the “place” where the “real” you feels welcome and comfortable can reach across thousands of miles and centuries of inherited experience. Moving to a place that is new to us can wake up new aspects of our identities that might have remained dormant if we hadn’t moved to the new environment. […]